My son started soccer again last night. It is so fun to watch him play.
On the way home we were talking. I asked him – it is good for you to be able to play soccer, huh? ‘Yeah, it’s a good way to work out my anger’ he said.
‘You have anger?’ I asked. Aware that the life of an 11 year old is turbulent, especially these days and in our house – he has three sisters.
‘Yeah – when I’m angry, I have sadness, when I’m sad, I have anger mixed in.’ We then had a great conversation about how anger is a secondary emotion, and when we feel anger, we need to stop and check why it is there because it is usually a protective emotion that is covering up an emotion that we need to deal with so we aren’t angry people.
He listed off three of his friends that have similar issues, some stemming from early childhood issues he is pretty sure.
Sometimes our kids surprise us in their ability to deal with difficult subjects. That was one of those rare conversations that I just love.